We have all heard the saying that Black women have to work twice as hard to get half as far.
Every time I walk into work, I think about that phrase.
It makes me wonder if this is part of the reason Black women in leadership roles are perceived as not so friendly. If you are reading this thinking that is not true, I am ready to challenge that idea because far too often I have witnessed and heard stories of Black women in leadership being labeled as rude, stuck up, or difficult.
I currently work in two different fields. From 8 to 4, I work in human resources. From 4:30 to 7:30, I work part time as a paralegal. In both roles, I work directly under Black women. I will not speak too much about my HR role, but I do want to take a moment to talk about my paralegal job.
From day one, my attorney made me feel welcomed. She respects me and is intentional about making sure I gain all the knowledge I need to grow, especially knowing my goal is to become an attorney myself. She is quick to help and educate me in areas where I need support. She speaks to me as a peer rather than as someone beneath her title. We work well together and we laugh together. This is actually the first time I have worked under a Black woman in a higher role who made me feel like an equal.
While she knows the power she holds, she does not abuse it or take it for granted. Her focus is not on reminding the staff that she is above us. Instead, she shows us that while the work is important, so is maintaining a safe and supportive space to do it.
That experience has also made me pause and reflect on myself. It is a reminder that when I become an attorney, I cannot let the stress, pressure, and long hours needed to reach that role change the fun, loving, and warm woman that I am. At the same time, I recognize that sometimes the journey to leadership can shape people differently. Perhaps all the time and effort it took to get there hardened some, or maybe it was the environment they had to survive in. Seeing how my attorney leads, reminds me that it does not have to be that way, and that leadership can be strong, respected, and still human.
Every time I walk into work, I still think about that saying that Black women have to work twice as hard to get half as far. But now I also think about what that pressure does to the way they are forced to lead. When you are constantly fighting to be respected, there is little room left for softness. My experience reminded me that leadership does not have to be hardened to be respected, and that Black women should not have to choose between power and warmth. When they are allowed to lead as their full selves, the space changes, and so does everyone in it.
Love ya, BYE!
Tee Talk 