I once heard a pastor say, “God brings people into your life not to heal you, but to help you along your healing journey.”
PREACH!
Proverbs 27:17 says, “Iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” The people God places in our lives are meant to strengthen, refine and challenge us. They are there to walk beside us, not to carry us.
But healing starts with you.
So many times when we go through trauma or painful seasons, we take what feels like the easier route. Instead of truly doing the deep, uncomfortable work on ourselves, we lean on other people to try to fix what is broken inside of us. We look for someone to soothe the ache, distract us from the pain, or love us in a way that makes us forget what hurt us.
But that is not fair.
Because while we are battling our own unresolved wounds, we can end up wounding the people who are trying to love us. We start dumping our past onto them, expecting them to absorb it. We hope they will erase our pain. And without even realizing it, we create new trauma for them while trying to escape our own.
That is not love. That is avoidance.
Healing is scary. It is uncomfortable. It can feel lonely. Sometimes it feels like you are losing yourself before you even know who you are becoming. But that breaking apart is part of rebuilding.
Community matters. The right people can encourage you, pray for you, and hold you accountable. But they are not substitutes for the real work.
Sometimes the most loving thing you can do for yourself and for others is to sit with your pain and seek real help. A licensed therapist. Wise counsel. Time alone with God. Honest self reflection.
Other people are there to sharpen you, not to save you.
Healing is your responsibility.
And when you choose to do that work, you stop bleeding on people who did not cut you.
Love ya, BYE! 🧘🏾♀️
Tee Talk 