I was at work watching the rain start out as mist and turn into raindrops, eventually turning into a full-blown storm. And I started thinking, yeah, I get it. I really get it.
Because that is kind of how my moods work.
It usually starts small. Something minor. Something that probably should not even matter that much. Then it builds. A comment. A tone. A look. Next thing you know, I am annoyed. Then I am mad. Then it turns into a whole thing.
I have been told in past relationships that I am quick-tempered, but I love hard. Both are true.
When I am mad, I am mad. I do not always handle it well. But I also calm down fast. Once I do, I am ready to move on. I am ready to talk, laugh, fix it, and go back to normal. In my head, the problem is over.
The issue is that it is not always over for the other person.
That is the part I had to learn. Just because I feel better does not mean they do. Just because I am done being upset does not mean they are done being hurt.
I used to get frustrated about that. I would think, why are we still talking about this. Why are you still mad. But the truth is, they are allowed to be. If I brought the storm into their day, they are allowed to take their time getting over it.
I do not think I am a bad person. I think I am a person who feels things strongly and reacts fast. But I am trying to learn that my emotions do not get to set the timeline for everyone else.
And maybe growth for me looks like learning to pause before things turn into a whole storm in the first place.
Love ya, Bye!
Tee Talk 